Ghosts of the Past Chapter 8

Sienna

           I didn't hear anything from Razan. Dante couldn't bear to visit at the hospital after that day. I made a clear apology to both Sarah and Aseel, for what happened in the past. Also, today is the day I leave the hospital.

           "Kate... Will you take me to Dante?" I asked. "I thought you'd never ask." She replied as we went to see him. She made sure he saw me, then she left.

           Awkward silent... "How could you?!" He asked. I had to confront him.

           "It was wishful thinking... I'm sorry." I said. "That's crazy..." He sat from where he was standing. "Your crazy!" 

           I went and sat next to him. Dante was too shocked by what I did. I still had to explain myself to him. "Back when I was 7, I nearly lost my life... Though I was saved by an angel." I began to explain. "Why are you telling me this?" He asked. "Because I had wishful thinking." I thinking Dante realized what I was trying to say and stayed silent. 

            "When I met that angel, my life suddenly had a purpose, I wanted to be everything for that angel... Because I thought it was the only way to show my gratitude. Though later that angel flew away. I was roaming this world alone. I wanted to see that angel again... That's all." My voice shivered around the end.

           "That angel won't come for your aid." He stated. "Seems like it." I managed to say.

            He wrapped his arms around me. "I'll be your guardian angel from now on. So don't pull such stuns on me." He whisper. My face flashed red.

Razan

           I didn't wanna see Feras anymore. I left the house and wandered around... I heard baby cries I remembered, Mubarak... My mom can take care of Mubarak. What am I doing? I thought. When I looked up I realized that I was outside her apartment door. I wonder if she'll come if I waited for her here.

           Though how will she react?

           I found the keys in the same place she usually hide them and opened the door. The room seemed endlessly dark. Yet somehow, it felt like her. I just sat there wishing that she will come back. that she would find me here and wear that gentle smile of hers. I don't know how long I sat there... I even realized then that I didn't have my mobile with me... I only had the other phone she gave me.

Kate

           When I left Sienna's room after giving her the envelop. I noticed Tariq in the waiting room. "Tariq... Why are you sitting here?" I asked. "I can't leave yet... What if she does it again." His voice was shaky. "I'm sure she wouldn't now." I said. "How can you tell for sure?" He asked. "I just gave her a reason to hang on to life." I grinned.

           "Thank you." I could feel happiness from his voice. He really cared about his sister. At that moment I've also realized that I cared about Sienna more than I would care to admit. I nodded. "Kate... Do you wanna talk about what happened that day?" He asked. I know he was referring to the time I found Sienna.  I wonder... Can it be interpreted to words?

Flash back

           When I woke up... I heard the water running and Sienna wasn't in bed. I looked at the bathroom door and it was half opened. The sink wasn't running any water so it must be the bathtub. As I got closer to the bathroom... I could see red all over the flood. I panicked, I didn't wanna go any further nor did I want to see what was there. Though, my body won't listen... I just kept going forward. I was screaming on the inside, but my body acted differently.

           Sienna was soaked in the tub... It was red all over, even the bubbles were red. Her left hand was cut by a razor blade. I know because it was on the bathroom floor. I was instantly next to Sienna. "Hey... Sienna, don't play such a mean game on me.." I mentally couldn't accept this. I touched her face it was still warm. I ran out of the bathroom and called for help. She was loosing too much blood. I took out a piece of cloths to slow down her bleeding. "Please, don't die." 

           I didn't know what it meant at the time but now I understand. "There's nothing to talk about." I replied. 

Sienna

             As I left Dante's place my phone rang. "Hello" I answered the phone. "Hey Sienna, how are you?!" Aunt Fatima asked. It's so unusual for her to call me. I was always the one to call her. "I'm alright, what's up?" I replied. It didn't sound like she knew about my suicide attempt. "...have you by any chance heard from Razan?" She sounded troubled. For her to ask me that... I was sure that Razan was in some kind of trouble.

           "When did she leave the house?" I asked. "She left 4 nights ago... And she didn't take her cellphone with her." She explained. Just what exactly are they thinking waiting till now to call me? I hang up the phone without saying anything. I called Sarah. 

           "Hello." She answered. "Sarah, you mentioned that you told Razan about what I did..." I said. "Yeah" she replied. "How did you contact her exactly?" I asked. "I texted her." She answered. "Did she write you back?" I wondered. "No." She said. I hung up again without saying anything. I called Kate and she said she didn't hear from Razan either.

           That means that Razan isn't in Spain. I need to go back to the country. I went to the airport and booked an urgent ticket. I flew back as soon as I could. I remembered the phone I gave her. So I called. It rang three times. "Hello." She said. I was in loss of words... "Hi." I replied. 

           "Will you come home?" She asked. "Um." I replied and went straight to my apartment. I wasn't hallucinating was I? I didn't find my key in its usual place. So I knocked the door. She opened the door then there was some awkward silent. I didn't move. "Aren't you coming in?" She asked. "Um." I replied and entered my apartment. 

           "Okayri Sie-chan." She grinned. "T-tadaima." I replied. Razan was wearing an apron and making food in the kitchen. She turned off the stove and came toward me. "Sie-chan... You look pale. You haven't been eating again have you?" She said. "I'm sorry." I replied.

            "Your lucky I made you dinner." She said. "It sure smells good." I smiled. She sat up the table and asked me to sit. As I sat she sat on my lap and held me. "I wanna feed you this time around." She said. I nodded. 

           After dinner she held my hand and walked to the bed room. "Let's take a bath together." She said and I nodded. I was still in loss of words.

           After the bath she jumped in bed. I sat at the edge of the bed with a towel around my neck. She wrapped her arms around me from behind. "I missed you." She said. I couldn't see her face. "I've missed you more." I replied. "Can we stay like this for a little while?" She asked as I felt her tears on my shoulder. She wouldn't make a sound. I patted her head as an approval.

           That night she didn't say anything about my scars or the half healed wound. Neither of us could sleep that night. We simply lied there all night. Razan was listening to my heartbeats and tracing every scar on my arm with her fingertips as if she was counting my scars. I don't know why... I just didn't want morning to come.

Razan

           I wanna correct things and keep her here, how can I do that?! As I was lost in thoughts listening to her heartbeats I realized that it was dawn already. I got up and sat on top of Sienna. "We should talk properly now." I suggested. She nodded.

           We gazed each other for awhile. "I..." I tried to say but she coved my mouth. "I heard you the first time." She said. I was surprised. "Let's try to have a normal relationship." She said. Even though, that was exactly what I was trying to say, part of me didn't want it.

           "Sie..." I said. "Tell me." She caressed my cheek. "C-can we live in this fantasy for a while first?" I shied away but she made me look at her again and with a most beautiful smile.. One I've never seen before she nodded.

           On our second night together Sienna played me a song that she wrote for me. It was beautiful. Also one the fifth night I overheard her playing a different song. It was one that I've never heard before. As I heard the song I couldn't help but to wonder what kind of pain that Sienna's been through. 

           Though before the song ended, it pictured her sorrow in the cruelest way. I didn't realized it until she embraced me. I was crying silent tears, though in her arms I couldn't hold it any longer. She didn't ask why I was crying, nor did she ask the next day. Though I believe in her heart she knew I heard that song. 

           A week has passed since we been living together without  hearing from anyone in the wold. I wish we could live like this forever. As I was cleaning up the room I found a folded piece of paper. I think it fell from Sienna's cloths. So I unfolded the paper to check

Dear Sienna, 

           Thank you for the music... You saved my life. I guess you heard that a lot by now. I'm so silly thinking the song was for me. I was on the berg of breaking... I was evening willing to commit suicide. Though your song saved my life. I'm convinced that you wrote the song for me. So Thank you.

           I selfishly beg of you to keep singing and making music. Your music became my strength. I know I can face the world when I hear your songs. I hope this letter would mean something to you and the home made cookies are my way of showing my gratitude. I hope you liked the cookies. I've put my heart into making them...

Xoxo, Amber.

P.S. If you ever felt down, or if someone ever discouraged you... Remember that you've saved someone's life.

            I wish I could support Sienna that way. When I looked up Sienna was already awake and she realized I was reading the letter. She gestured for me to go back to bed with her. I went there and handed her the paper. She kinda throw it away, well she put it away actually.

           "Your way too energetic lately." She said. I totally didn't expect that. She held me and lied back in bed. "Sienna it's 1 pm..." I was saying though she covered my mouth. "Just a little bit longer." She said. I guess fantasy work best for both of us.

           Though the fantasy came to an end faster than both of us hoped. That night Sienna got a call from Kate. They spoke a little over an hour. In the other room... So I don't really know what they spoke of. 

           Sienna looked irritated when she came out. The last time I saw her wearing that expression was back when we were 6. Just what in the world did they speak of?

           "Sie..." I called after her. Her expression changed when she looked at me... Just like when we were little. "...is everything alright?" I asked. "Well... I guess. Though its time for me to face the music." She said. We're making a little progress she just admitted that there is trouble on the way.

           I went up to her and hugged her tightly. "Will you tell me... What happens?" I asked. "I will." She replied. I know I shouldn't be happy about something like this. But at least I'll hear her talk.

           "Razz.. get dressed, I'll take you home." she said. We changed our clothes and was about to leave the apartment. "I'll probably only be in Spain for a week." She said. "I'll be waiting for your return." I replied.

           We got on her motorcycle, and she dropped me home. I kissed her goodbye as she left. When I entered the house mom was waiting for me with Mubarak. "Feras left." She said. Part of me wasn't bothered.

Aseel

           "What are you saying?" I asked. "I'm saying we grew apart musically." She said. "What do you mean? they are both skilled." I asked. "I mean I want out of the band and your free to play with them of course." She said.

           "What makes you think that I wanna still be in the band if your not?" I asked. "You were playing with them when I left." She replied. "I was playing because I wanted you to see me." I mumbled and left the room.

            Sarah came to the living room and sat in the couch in front of me. Kate was at the house in half an hour. "Aseel, what is she thinking?!" Kate asked me. I looked away. "What the fuck guys? Sienna is just out of the hospital and we have 3 concerts in the up coming weeks." Kate yelled. 

            "You can take the lead, the contract with the label is ending in a month and I can bail whenever I want. That was part of the contract too." Sarah said calmly. "What about Sienna?!" Kate was frustrated.

           "What about Sienna?" Sarah wondered. "SARAH.. Don't act dump on me!!" Kate yelled while grabbing Sarah's cloths. "Kate that's enough." I said as I got them away from each other. "Don't get me wrong, Kate. I value her friendship. Though the band is a different story." Sarah said. 

           Kate still looked frustrated. "Has anyone heard from Sienna after she got out of the hospital?" I asked. "A week ago, she said she's with Razan." Kate mumbled. "These two should really get on with it already." Sarah commented. We both stared as her. "What? You're all thinking it." She said. "Kate call Sienna and tell her about the situation." I shrugged. Kate nodded and went outside to speak with Sienna.

           "Hey, are you mad at me?" Sarah asked. "No... Just go easy on Sienna for a little while." I replied. "Stating the obvious is making me some sort of villain now?" She sighed. "That's not what I said." I said. She reached for my hand and asked me to sit next to her. As we waited for Kate to come back.

Kate

           I feel a sense of responsibility towards Sienna lately. I heard the sound of a car  engine when I looked up she was there. "Are they inside?" She asked. She was so calm as if it was a happy day. I couldn't help but to calm down when I saw her like that.

           "Hey girls." She grinned and hugged & kissed both of them. She sat on the table in front of the sofa where they were sitting and faced them with a gentle smile. "Kate told me over the phone that you were planning to leave the band." Sienna said while holding Sarah's hand. "It deeply saddened me." She wore a hurt expression.

           I believe Sarah was speechless. "Sarah, your one of the most talented people I know. Your music bring out the best in me. If not for me, then for your fans. Please keep playing music." She said.

           I couldn't see Sarah's expression, but Aseel's jaw was dropped open. "Excuse me." Sarah said, then she held Aseel's hand and left the room with her. "Are you okay Sienna?" I asked. She nodded. Half an hour have passed already and they are not back.

           "Kate... There is a song I wrote last week. I want you to hear it.... And maybe we can play it on our next concert." She said. "Sure." I replied. I think an hour has passed before they were back.

           "Sienna, I truly appreciate your speech earlier..." Sarah was saying. "It want a speech, I truly meant it." Sienna interrupted. Sarah's face went bright red. I never know she was the type to get shy. Aseel whispered something in her ear and Sarah ran upstairs.

           "Sienna how did you do it?" Aseel asked. Sienna looked confused. Sarah ran back into the living room and she was back to normal. "I apologize Sienna. Even though I do value our friendship still. Your one of...no you're the only true friend I ever had. But I can't stay in the band." She said.

           Sienna went up to Sarah. She caressed her cheek, looked her in the eye and said  "how unfortunate. I wish to hear you play again, my Friend."

           Sienna kissed Sarah's forehead. "Sienna... Stop flirting with my.. My wife." Aseel's face went red as she said those words. "Aseel..." Sienna looked at her. Aseel shied away immediately. "She'll play with you." Sarah answered before Sienna could ask.

           Sienna looked at me and smiled. I shied away too. I was surprised about their reaction but I get it now. She looked at me as if am the only person that matters in this world. It's dangerous I almost fell for her.

           I've also noticed something that was gonna make me burst in laughter. Both Aseel and Sarah were falling for Sienna. I won't explain how I noticed this though.

           "Sienna, come on let's go to Dante's so I cam hear your new song." I said. She nodded and came toward me. Both Sarah and Aseel flee upstairs. As we were leaving I had to ask.

           "Sienna..." I called. "Yes." I had her full attention. It's kinda embarrassing. "What happened between you and Razan last week?" I asked. "We became friends." She had the brights smile on her face. Though am totally lost... Aren't they childhood friends already?

           As we got to Dante's apartment she looked for him. "I'm back." She said. I couldn't hear their conversation clearly as they were in the bed room.

           When they came back to the living room Dante lifted me up as usual and kissing my cheek. "I'm not a child anymore." I argued. I heard Sienna laughter. "Get me down." I frowned. 

           "I'm just messing with you." He said and patted my head. I was irritated now. "Stop bothering Katie." Sienna said and she hugged me. "She's so cute. I can't help it." He said. "Isn't she?" Her eyes were glowing as she poked my check. This is so wrong. They are both toying with me.

           "So Can I keep her?" Dante ask Sienna. "No, I'm keeping her." She said. "Hey, both of you I'm not a pet for you to keep." I yelled. "Kate.." Sienna said with a straight face, looking me in the eyes. "Yes." I said. It felt serious. "...your the cutest thing ever!" She said. This is too much I went all red.

           "What the hell did you give her Dante?" I yelled. "Nothing I swear." He put up his hands. "Sienna would you let me hear your song already." I asked. "Um." She grinned. I'm glad that she seems happy now. Dante went to his bedroom. Sienna grabbed my electric guitar and plugged it in. 

           She played a very sad heavy sound. It brought me to tears. When she finished she put down the guitar and embraced me. Just what is this. I couldn't stop myself from crying even if I tried. "I love the song." I sniffed. "I'm glad." She said. She didn't comment on my tears... Is it the reaction she expected. Or is it because she understood the tears?

Sienna

           I went back to the country to see Razz. She said she'll wait for my return. I've longed to hear her say those words. When I got there her mom answered the door. She told me that Razz is in her bedroom and that I could go see her. That meant that Feras wasn't around, perfect.

           When I entered her room she was laying in bed. "Sienna..." She called in her sleep. I sat at her bed side and caressed her cheek. "I'm right here." I said. "She opened her eyes and held my hand. "I'm cold." She said. It was winter and her room was cold. I took off my coat and covered her with it. Then I lied next to her to warm her up.

           "How long will you stay?" She asked. "Three days." I replied. She wrapped her arms around me and leaned closer. As if saying 3 days aren't enough, but she won't say it out loud. "What happened in Spain?" She asked. "Sarah left the band." I replied. "Does she have commitment issues?" She asked. "I think she just realized that she developed faster than the band. She's as good as Tariq, if not even better." I explained.

           "You really admire her, huh?" Razz wondered. "Of course, she's an outstanding musician." I replied. "Does that mean Aseel is out too?" She asked. "No Aseel is still with us." I answered. "When is your concert again?" She wondered. "It's in 4 days." I replied.

           "I miss seeing you play." She implied. She's trying her best not to ask for anything. "I'll take you with me then." I said. "Are...." She was about to say. I stopped her. "It's final." I said. She blush.

           For some reason recently all the girls became shier than usual. I fell asleep next to her as we were holding each other.  It's morning and Feras didn't get here. Should I ask about him? Why bother? I woke up before Razan this time and made her breakfast. Mubarak can crawl now. Even though its only been a week.

           I held him and played with him a little. "Good morning." Razan said as she entered the kitchen. "Morning." I replied and kissed her forehead. "Dada dada." Mubarak was trying to say something. Aunt Fatima came into the kitchen and took him from me.

          "Mom, I'm going to Spain with Sienna in 3days." Razan told her mom. "Have fun you two." She replied. Razan looked at me and grinned. We fell back to our old habits. I fed her breakfast, she sat in my lap as we watched TV together. I hummed her a lullaby as we went to sleep. Through out the day we took pictures together and shared them with our friends.

           The next day she said she wanted to go out. So we went to a movie and did some shopping. We bought baby cloths for her daughter that's on the way. We ate out as well and visited Farah since we haven't seen her for a while.

           The third day I packed my bag as well as Razan's and then took her to her doctors appointment. After her check up we flew to Spain.

           When we got there Kate and Aseel were waiting for us at the airport. They led the way to a limo. Sarah was there standing next to the door. "I told you, they were officially a couple now." She commented. I went up to Sarah and hugged her. "Your gonna play the last 3 gigs for me, aren't you?" I whispered in her ears. Her ears went red. "It's for the fans." She shouted though her face was still bright red. 

           Razan giggled. "Your wife is cute when she's angry." I patted Aseel's head. "Stop flirting with her though." She mumbled. I chuckled. "It's good to see you again Razan." Kate said as we went into the limo.

Sarah

           The most thing I regret that day was when Sienna asked me if I were gonna play the last 3 gigs for her.... I wish I've said I would play them for her. None of us truly thought it was the end.

           That day when she played her song for us as we were practicing for the gig. We all became overwhelmed with emotion we couldn't get it together until 3 hours after hearing the song first. Aseel kept dropping her drum sticks 20 seconds after the song begins. We called it a day after 5 tries.

           Later that night. "Aseel... I know your strong enough to do it." I said. She hugged tightly and started crying again. "You've seen it haven't you?" I asked. "I'm scared..." She whimpered. She was shivering. I'm not sure how to handle this. "I'll always be here for you, nothing will ever hurt you." I assured her. One that same night I heard knocking on the door.

           "Sarah, I wanna ask you a favor." She said. I went with her to the studio as she played me a beautiful song. "Sienna... We should record them both tomorrow!" I told her. "You liked it?" She asked. "I love it." I replied. We lived different lives and suffered different wounds. Though for some reason I feel like I understand her best. 

           "Sarah... Can we record these song alone?" She asked. What happened during practice pained her. "I don't wanna see them hurt, but you understand the songs right?" She said. "We'll record them alone tomorrow." I assured her. "Thank you." She had a wide smile on her face as she hugged me.

           The next night I recorded both songs with her and I even sang with her. She was surprised that I could sing. "Sarah, you have a beautiful voice. You shouldn't hide." She said. "I'm not hiding it... It just that I'm a guitarist." I shied away. She smiled gently. I will never forget that smile. We couldn't play her song except in the last concert.

It's been ten years now... 

           Today we're holding a concert as memorial for her. Along with 3 up coming bands that are paying their tributes. 

           "Where is Dante? The show is about to start." I complained. "That guy is such a diva." Kate commented. "He's here." Tariq announced. "What are you wearing?" Aseel asked. We all laughed. "She dared me to wear that for a concert... But I never did." He said. We all got gloomy. "Let's play her this concert." Kate said as she put her hand out. 

           We all put our hands together and prayed for her. We also decided to give it our best. Aseel kissed me for good luck she says. "For her." Kate looked at me with a faded smile. I nodded as we went on stage.

           Right before I entered the stage, Razan stopped me. She was there with her son and daughter. "Please show them... What they've missed." She whimpered. "Naka nai de." I wiped way her tears. I leaned towards her. "Sienna is still here." I whispered and pointed at her heart.

           We sang 4 song then Sienna's song. After that it was time for the song that Sienna wrote for Razan. "This last song was written by Sienna with a special someone in mind... So I would like to dedicated this song for that special someone." As we played the last song.

The End.

Thank you for reading All you Need is One & Ghosts of the Past. I hope you enjoyed them and stay tuned for the next story it's gonna be completely different! 

Ghosts of the Past Chapter 7

Kate

"What's wrong Dante ?!" I asked. "...I confessed to Sienna." He said. "You did what?!" I was shocked. He didn't say a word. "Tell me all the details." I demanded. "I was walking her to her apartment, she said that she had a lot of fun with me..." he was saying. "I don't need, all the details, all the details." I interrupted. "Oh, I told her that I loved her, more like in love with her... She said she liked me, but she cant love me the way I do." He said.

"Doesn't that mean that there is still hope? That she might love you someday." I wondered. "I asked her that... She said that she's not capable of love and that it would never happen." He replied. "That's harsh." I commented. "I told her I would wait for her, and that she'll come around. She kissed me and said 'you'll be waiting forever then.'" He explained. "Can you repeat what you just said?" I asked.

"I told her I would wait for her, and that she'll come around." He said. "Not that the next part." I demanded. "She kissed me and..." He was saying. "You mean like on your cheek?" I interrupted. I just can't imagine Seinna kissing anyone otherwise. "No! A... French kiss." His face went red. "You're laying!!" I was absolutely shocked. "I'm not." He said.

I believe that was the day that Sienna started changing. That was 7 months ago. Our attempt to return Sienna to her sanity have failed. We're back in Spain Dulce came to visit. She feels more like family than a fan. She also has a crush on Sienna.

Sarah, wanted to play board games so we all joined in. We played monopole, Life, poker, and Guess who... But it was too early to call it a night. "Let's play truth or dare then." Aseel suggested. "Boring..." Sienna complained as she was walking away. "Who said you can bail?!" Sarah stopped her. "And who said, you get to tell me what to do?" Sienna replied. "Sienna, three rounds if you get bored by then... Your free to leave." I said. "She sat back down.

We spun the bottle and it was Sienna to ask and Aseel to answer. "Truth or Dare." Sienna said. "Dare." Aseel replied. I think she was trying to make it more interesting for Sienna to stay. "Strip." She smirked. Sarah looked irritated. I've never seen her like that before. Aseel took of her cloths. She kept her underwear on though.

The bottle was spun again I get to ask and Dulce was to answer. "Truth or Dare." I asked. "Truth." Dulce said. "Name the person you have a crush on." I asked, I knew the answer but I wanted to see how Sienna would react. "S...Sienna." Dulce's face went red. Sienna, chuckled. "You should've said something earlier." She kissed Dulce. Not the reaction I was expecting, but it sure made me laugh.

The bottle was spun again Sienna gets to ask and I was on the answering end. "Truth or dare." She asked. "Truth." I replied. "Tell us, your ex boyfriend's full name." She said. I said truth because I didn't want to do something as extreme as what she made Aseel do, yet this feels worst. "Tariq Saqer xxx" I replied.

"No... No... No" Aseel shouted. There is only one guy in the country with this name and it's her brother. "Now this is interesting." Sienna said. "Sienna, get out of here now." Sarah demanded. "I think I'll staying." Sienna replied. "Your three rounds are over... Please leave." I backed up Sarah. "Wanna come with Dulce?" Sienna asked. Dulce nodded and they went to Sienna's room.

Now I have to face the storm. "Did you touch my little brother?!" Aseel shouted. "Don't you think, your making a big deal out of this? He broke up with me over a year and a half ago." I shrugged. "I just wanna know, what the hell were you thinking?" She demanded. "I'm not gonna talk about it, ask your brother if you wanna know anything." I left to my room. "Seel, it's not that weird that he dated her since she's only 4 years older than him." Sarah said.

I was upstairs near Sienna's room. "... like would you be happy if I slept with you?" Sienna said. "Yeah, it would!" Dulce said. My face went red, dulce is way too bold. I went to my room.

Sarah

"It is weird we used to live together you know." She said. "It doesn't mean they did anything back then." I replied. She frowned. "I don't know why your making such a big fuss about it..." I complained. "He's my little brother, Sarz." She defended her action. "I know, but it happened so long ago." I insisted. "So, what now? Should I just forget about it?" She asked.

"Yeah, just focus on the present." I handed her her cloths. "Why do you look so upset?" She asked."I'm not, I wanna go kill Sienna though..." I murmured. "Wait a minute. Is that about the dare?" She asked. "Not really... Well partly." I replied. "You know she's not mentally stable right now." She defended. I got irritated.

"That doesn't mean I should tolerate her actions." I raised my voice. "Sarah, calm down... Please." She calmly said. I calmed myself down, she kissed me. "Don't talk to Sienna for few days." She said. "Okay." I kissed her back. We were still in the living room. "Would you like to undress me now?" She whispered. I think asking her to put her cloths on actually offended her.

She sat on my lap facing me. "Always a pleasure." I whispered in her ear. Her ears went red along with her face and I haven't even touched her yet. "Bye girls." Dulce said as she left the house. "I think we should go to bed." I suggested. Aseel nodded.

Kate

"Kate..." Sienna was knocking on my bedroom door. "What?" I opened the door. "I'm sorry about earlier." She said. "Don't worry about it." I replied. "What are you doing?" She asked. "I was shredding, then you came here." I said. "I wanna listen." She replied. "It's gonna be loud though." I hesitated. "I see tomorrow during practice then." She said. "Sure." I nodded. "would you sleep next to me tonight?" She asked. "No." I replied. "Pretty please..." She insisted with those puppy eyes. "Fine." I sighed.

I turned off the amplifier and went to her room. "Your room is surprisingly clean." I commented. "Thank you." She replied. She went and laid in bed. I noticed the gift bag that the fan gave Sienna the other day. "Sienna." I said. When I looked at her she was already asleep. I looked inside the bag there was an opened cookie jar and an unopened letter.

I read the letter before I went to sleep. I don't know why Sienna didn't read the letter but I'm sure it would make her happy. When I woke up the next morning, Sienna wasn't in bed and I can hear the water running from the bathroom.

Sienna

When I opened my eyes I was laying in a hospital bed. My throat was dry. I saw Kate and My brother Tariq there. "Water." I murmured. Kate brought me some water. Tariq was still silent. He held my hand when Kate left the room. He didn't look at me yet. "Thank god your alive." He said. I petted his head.

"Sienna..." He whimpered. "I'm sorry, I haven't been there for you the way I should've been. I'm so sorry... I know I've failed you, but that doesn't mean you get to die on me." He met my gaze, and his eyes were red filled with tears. "... Don't bail on me."

I didn't know what to say. I didn't think anyone would miss me when I'm gone. "Say something anything...." He choked. I looked away. "Sienna, you need help... You need to talk to someone about whats going on with you..." He was saying. "What's going on with me?!" I interrupted. "You know I've always got your back." He shrugged.

"I know." I replied. "I know it's not just what happened earlier this year with Razan, it started since you were 7. It's already been so long, talk about it already." He said. "I don't wanna talk about it." I replied. "You have to, you won't get over it otherwise, isn't Aseel a psychologist?" He asked. "She is, but I won't talk to her." I said. "Why not?" He got confused. "I'll talk to someone else about it." I shrugged.

"Okay then..." He said. After a little while Kate came back with Sarah and Aseel. "I just spoke with the doctor and he said you have to stay here for two more days and you have to talk to a shrink before they release you." Kate explained. "Not gonna happen." I grinned. "Sienna we just spoke about this." Tariq said. "I didn't agree on a shrink, I said I'll talk to someone." I argued.

"Eh, like that's gonna work out... I've been trying to get anything out of you for months now." Kate complained. "Kate it's more than you think, so leave her be." Tariq said. "Sienna, you can talk to me if you like." Aseel offered. "Thanks for the offer." I replied. "Btw we informed Razan of what had happened." Sarah said. "You shouldn't have done that... It's not good for her pregnancy." I replied.

"She didn't mention that she was pregnant." Aseel was confused. "She's not the kind to share." I replied as we heard knocking on the door. I couldn't see who was behind the door. "It's Dante." Kate said, and went to open the door for him. "What have you done, Sienna?" Dante shouted. "Can you all just leave I need to sleep." I shrugged and hid under the cover.

"Hey Dante, calm down." Kate said as they left. When I lifted the cover Tariq was still there. "What do you need to make you feel better?" He asked. "Bring me my bass and laptop." I replied. He nodded then left the room. The nurses came in short after and gave me some pills to help me sleep.

Kate

"I never thought she would do something like that." He said. "You should've tuned it down a little, her brother was there." I replied. "I couldn't help it." He whimpered. I wrapped my arms around him. "She's okay... It's gonna be okay." I tried to comfort him. "I was so scared, when I heard." He said.

"We all were." I replied.

Aseel

Sarah seemed bothered by something, I didn't ask about it though. As soon as we were alone, "Aseel, please... Don't do anything like that again." She said. I was a bit confused, so I didn't reply. "Darling, are you with me?" She asked. I nodded. "I told you before I don't want you to be alone with her." She finally explained.

"I was just being nice... She said she'll never talk to a shrink, remember?" I defended my actions. "... I just can't shake off the thought." She murmured as she walked away. "Sarz, back then was just an accident." I said. "The more your alone with her, the chances of accidents will increase." She said.

"Trust me, I won't allow it." I surely said. "It's her I can't trust." She left.

Sienna

My next day at the hospital...

Tariq handed me my laptop. "I'm sorry, they wouldn't let me bring the bass." He said. "It's okay, thank you." I replied. He was about to sit, "don't stay... I wanna be left alone." I demanded. "Are you sure?" He asked. "Yeah, go." I replied. So he left. I turned on the laptop and sat there till it opened. I logged into my email and wrote for Razan.

Dear Razz,

It's been a while since I last mailed you... I hope you're doing alright. I hope you weren't alarmed by the news you've heard. I believe they've exaggerated. As you can see I'm writing you this email, so I'm fine.
I meant to email you sooner but I didn't get the chance. I wanted to apologize for my behavior when we last met. I didn't mean to take it out on you... The doctors here want me to speak to a shrink and Tariq think so too. I... I don't know how to handle this. He said I should talk to someone about that time back when we were 7... I don't even wanna remember it. The only thing I kept dear to me from that time is you. You saved me back then and I took an oath to protect you the way you did for me. I tried my best to satisfy your needs. Your smile made my life worth while. Though as you became the center of my world... All you seemed to see was me. It made me happy, though I feared your heart my break if something were to happen to me. I feared loneliness for you. I tried to get you to have more friends. Then you drafted away. My life is meaningless without you, and we both know that. Even though I've failed you, I dare say I need to see you again.

I'm sorry...

I miss you

Yours Truly, Sie.

While I was sending the email Kate came in. "Sienna, I know you wanted to be left alone. However I meant to give you this yesterday, but I had to calm Dante down and lost track of time." She said and handed me an open latter envelop. "What is this?" I wondered. "It's a latter from a fan, the girl that gave you home made cookies..." She was saying.

"I remember her, she was a good kisser." I teased. Kate's face went red. "Read it will you." She shrugged. "Will do." I replied. "Btw Dante is really worried about you, talk to him sometime." She said as she was leaving.

I opened the latter and started reading. Tears filled my eyes as I finished. I owe it to my fans to live... I just realized that now. I cried myself to sleeping thinking what a horrible think I've done.

Ghosts of the Past Chapter 6

Sienna

The doctors gave me meds and released. "You look better today." Dulce said. "Thanks I do feel better." I said. We went to Sarah's though no one was there. So I called Sarah. "Sienna, I'm sorry.... Here is the address, come." She said when she first answered. So Dulce took me to Sarah's new address.

It was a two room loft different from the mansion or the house. When I went inside Sarah, Aseel and Kate were sitting around the dinning table silently. "Is everything alright?" I asked. "Yeah, I'm glad your alright Sienna." Sarah hugged me. For some reason she didn't seem alright... "I'm also glad that your alright." Aseel said as she held Sarah's hand and left the room. "Aren't you glad that I'm back?" I asked Kate. "Not really, it's been only one night." She replied. "I figured you would say something like that." I said. She giggled.

Later that night....

I shared the room with Kate. There was a double bed and a sofa. I took the sofa and let her have the bed. I wasn't sleepy so left the room, there was a bookshelf in the living room where I found a book called The Stand by Stephen King and decided to read it. While I was reading I overheard some chatter coming from Sarah's room. "What did he say?!" Aseel asked. Then there was silence. "Sarah talk to me...." Aseel demanded.

I tried to concentrate on the novel but I couldn't. "What the fuck is he thinking?" Aseel yelled. "Hell if I know." Sarah replied. "That women is the most selfish creature on the plant... I wouldn't believe anything she says, I wish I could let your dad see that." Aseel said. "I don't care as long as I don't see her." Sarah commented.

Now I understand why she was feeling uneasy this morning. "I need to go bake something..." Sarah said. This is my cue... "Or I could relieve your stress." Aseel replied. The walls are way too thin. I went back to the room and laid on the couch. The book slipped from my hand as it made a loud throbbing sound, Kate woke up.... "Sienna, your still awake?" She asked. "Yeah..." I replied.

"I think it was all Feras." She said. "I know..." I replied. "You know this bed is big enough for two..." She implied. "I know, I don't want to disturb you while you sleep besides... I'm not sleepy." I said. "Okay." She said. The thing about Kate is that she cares a lot about people, yet she's afraid of showing it. I still don't understand why she hides behind the mean girl's act. Even though she's the kindest and most caring person I know.

About an hour has passed... And I'm still not sleepy. I left the room again, Sarah and Aseel were in the kitchen and Sarah was baking. As I was passing through "I'm going out..." I grabbed a jacket and left. I was roaming all over the place. Until I realized that I was standing outside the hotel where Razan is. What am I doing?! I thought. I turned around and started walking away.

"Sienna... Is that you?" A man's voice called, I can't recognize the voice though. I turned around and it was Sarah's dad. "Yeah... " I replied. "Thank god. I've been trying to contact Sarah ever since last night... Though she won't return my calls nor my texts." He said. I didn't say anything. "Is she okay?" He asked. "yeah she's okay." I replied. "Did she talk about what happened last night?" He asked. "No.." I replied.

He was silent for few seconds. "Want me to tell her anything?" I asked. "No, though.... I would like to talk, if you cared to listen." He said. "Sure" I replied. I'm useless, yet listening to people's concerns seems to put them at ease. So, he told me everything that happened. "What should I do?" He asked. "I'm sorry, I can't tell you what to do." I replied. He sighed. "I also don't like to speak ill of people... But I feel like you should know this." I said.

"I'm listening." He was interested in what I was about to say. "What do you think of a woman that abandoned her child by the age of 10 and cut ties with her family to a point that she won't attend her own mother's funeral ?" I asked. "What do you mean?" I don't think he was asking, I think he was trying to deny the fact. "Do you believe a woman like that is capable of caring or loving anyone?" I asked. "I don't think so... But how is that relevant?" He said. "That's the woman your about to marry... Do you understand the girls feeling now?" I asked.

"People change..." He argued. "I don't think a heartless person could suddenly gain a heart." I stated. "She deserves a chance." He said. "Mr.AbdulAziz... You can give her a chance if you want. It's your life after all." I grinned. We were at the hotel bar when we were talking. "Thank you for listening." He said. "Sure, anytime." I replied. "I think I should go." He said as he left his seat. "See you later." I replied.

I know that I should leave too but I couldn't... I went to see Dulce instead. "Sienna!!" She was excited to see me. "Hey there..." I replied. "What brings you here ?!" She asked. I didn't replied. "Are you okay?!" She asked. "What is it exactly that you do here?" I shrugged. "Room service." She said. "Interesting... May I ask you a favor?" I asked. "Sure anything." She said. I gave her Razan's room number and asked her to send flowers there.

I really just wanted to make sure that she's alright. I was anxiously waiting in the staff room for Dulce's return. My phone rang, "hello." I answered. "Sienna, come here someone is passed out." Dulce said. I ran to the elevator though it was slow so I ran up the stairs. Razan please be alright I though. When I got there Feras was sitting on the edge of the bed crying... "I don't know what to do.... I don't know what to do."

Razan was passed out on the bed. "Move!" I yelled and ran up to her. I touched her forehead and she was burning up. "Call an ambulance now!!!" I demanded. Dulce called an ambulance. "Tell them she passed out from a fever." I was shivering... I don't know how I managed to carry her to the bathroom. I filled the tub with cool water and placed her there. She started kicking and screaming. "Let me out." She screamed. My heart ached... This was the only way to bring her fever down till an ambulance arrive.

I had to place her down though she was fighting too hard. I got in the tub with her and held her from behind. "I'm sorry, Razz." I whispered in her ear. She was still unaware of herself. The medics arrived soon after and took her to the hospital. When I left the bathroom I saw Feras sitting in the corner of the room muttering the same words over and over.

I went to the hospital with her and waited till the doctors finished their work. When I wanted to see her the nurses told me that her husband was already here and only family are allowed. I had to go back to the loft. It was morning already and the girls were waiting for me for practice. They didn't ask where I was.

Few days later I had to go to the doctor for my blood. They did some blood tests and said that I should keep on taking the medications. We also had to go back to the country and I moved out of Razan's place and got my own apartment. Kate was living in the same building.

A month has passed...

Today Razan comes back from her honey moon. I haven't seen her since that day though Dulce kept me updated with how she's doing. After work as I was going to my apartment I saw Dante. "Hey, Sienna whats up?" He said. "Hi, I just came back from work." I replied. "Wanna go grab a bit and play some pool?" He asked. "What's the catch?" I replied. "No catch." He said.

So I went to dinner with him and we played pool. It was so obvious that he was letting me win. After that we went back to our building. His apartment was in a lower floor than mine. "So, this was fun we should do this again sometime." He said. "Yeah, it was so much fun! Though you better give it your all next time." I replied. "Was I that obvious?" He wondered. "Way too obvious." I giggled. He chuckled.

"Until next time?" I said. "See you soon." He kissed my cheek and left the elevator. My face went red. I was surprised. When the elevator opened up again I saw her sitting there outside my apartment's door. I looked for my phone and realized its been dead ever since I drove back from work.

I ran up to her "My humble apologies, your majesty." I kneeled before her. She wrapped her arms around me. "Where have you been?!" She whimpered. I carried her inside. "I..." I began to say though she shushed me. "I missed you so much!!" She whispered. "I miss you more." I simpered. "May I spend the night?" She asked. "You never have to asked... Your always welcome." I answered.

We took a bath then I dried her hair. We laid in bed silently... She wrapped my arms around her. "I've dreamt about you." She said. "You did?" I replied. She turned to look at me. "You were this close... Yet I couldn't touch you." She caressed my cheek. "The more I tried, the farther you'd go until your image disappears... That's when I wake up." She said.

I held her hand. "The nightmare is over now." I assured her. She clung to me. "I wish that you're a guy sometime." She said. "Why?" I wondered. She sat up and looked into my eyes. "Cause I wouldn't need Feras then..." She held my hand. "And nothing would keep us apart." She finished. I kissed her hand. "I can change his mind if you like." I suggested.

"I don't want you to go this far, I care about him." She said. "I know." I replied. "I just... I don't want to choose between the two of you." She said. "You don't have to... I'm merely your humble knight. My loyalty is to you alone." I vowed. She kissed my cheek. "I wish I can stay in your arms forever... You'll be here when I wake up, won't you?" She asked. "I shall, if that's what you wish my lady." I replied.

Next morning...

There were throbbing on the door. "Open the god damn door." Feras yelled from outside. I went to open the door. "How may I help you?!" I asked as I opened the door. "Get away." He was about to push me, when I twisted his hand and seized him to the wall. "It's rude, to pick a fight with someone when your a guest in their house." I lectured him.

"I'm here for my wife." He whimpered. "You could've just said that now, couldn't you?" I let go of him and closed the door. I went to wake up Razan though she was already up. "Ask him to leave, I don't want to see him." She said as soon as she saw me. "Sure." I replied and went back to the living room where he was waiting. I opened the apartment door, "you should leave, her majesty doesn't wish to see you." I said.

"Your fucking kidding me right?" He yelled. "The door is wide open, unless you want me to resort to violence." I threatened him. "I'm going to see her." He shrugged. He must be stupid. I was in front of him before he could make his second step. I shoved him to the wall. "I'm not gonna repeat myself twice." I threatened. He was panting. "How is it that you're still win?" He gasped. "Your silliness is irritating me..." I blustered then threw him out.

I don't understand why I'm this angry. The bell rang, I opened the door. It was Dante... "Is everything alright?" He asked. "Yeah everything is fine." I assured him. "There were some loud noises." He confronted me. "Yeah, I'm sorry to disturb you." I said. "Sie... Is he gone?" Razan asked from behind me. "Yeah." I closed the door. She clung to me. "Thank you." She said. I patted her head.

"Razz, I have to go to work. Will you be okay by yourself?" I asked. She nodded. I prepared her breakfast and got changed for work. "I'll be back." I said as I was leaving. "I'll be waiting." She kissed my cheek.

After work...

When I came back from work Kate was at my place with Razan. "I'm home." I said. "Welcome home." Razan came up to me and kissed my cheek. "What brings you here Katy girl?" I wondered. "Razan was bored so I kept her company." She said. "Thank you." I grinned. "Since your back, I'll get going." Kate said as she left. "You weren't somewhere?" Razan noticed the bag I was holding.

"I got you something." I announced as I opened the bag. "A cell phone? I've already got one..." She said. "It's for when Feras decides to act out again, hide it somewhere safe." I explained. "That's so thoughtful." She grinned. "It's been awhile since I've seem your smiling face. It's delightful." I simpered. Razan blushed.

"I was thinking I should go back, and speak with Feras." She said. "That's a good idea." I encouraged her. "I'll call you after I speak with him." She said. "I'll take you there." I offered. "I wanna do this on my own." She kissed my cheek and left.

She called me later that night saying that things are good between them. She said he won't take her phone again, nor stop her from seeing me. She claimed that he's trying to become a better man for her and wants to keep his promise. I'm glad that it turned out this way and I hope he's sincere.

A month have passed...

I've seen less of Razan in the past month. Though she looks very happy whenever I saw her. It seem like Feras is keeping his promise. I've been busy with work and the band, but I would go check on Razan every night. Most night I don't see her, but her mom assures me that's good.

Recently though, something seemed off with Razan. She seemed weaker than usual. She looked kinda pal, I've been trying to get her to eat. Though she feels sick whenever she feels food. That's why I've decided that I would pay her a visit as soon as the weekend comes and share my concern probably take her to the hospital as well.

It's the weekend. I just finished breakfast when heard knocking on the door. "Coming" I said as I placed the dishes in the sink. I opened the door "My queen." I bowed and kissed her hand. I guess our thoughts are synced. "I need to talk to you..." She said. "Sure, come in." I said as we went inside and sat at the table.

"What's the matter, your highness?" I asked. "I need you to stop calling me that." She said. What's going on here... I thought. "I don't understand." I replied. "We need to stop the princess/knight role play." She explained. Something is seriously wrong here... I though. "Did something happen?" I asked. "I need to learn to take care of others... Feras is trying his best to take care of me, and I want to do the same for him." She explained.

Wait I'm confused... It feels like I'm watching a movie. we're friend, aren't we? Why doesn't it feel like she's about to break up with me. "Razz, the role play can stop no problem... But that's not all is it?" I said. "Correct, I can't see you, if I want to become a better wife for him." I blurt. I didn't wanna hear that... Take it back Razz please.

"Your my best friend, Razz..." I began. "It wasn't that way for me." She interrupted. Suddenly it went pitch black, I kept running calling for her. Until I found this mirror with her reflecting. I nudge the mirror 'Razz don't leave me' I yelled. "If that's what you wish my queen." I said.

I was lost inside myself. I don't have any control over this body anymore. I can't see her in the mirror anymore, that's my bed room door. "Sienna..." She called after me. I stopped. When I stopped I realized that it was still me. Have I lost my mind? She stood behind me. "I'm sorry." She said. "I understand." I turned.

'I don't understand please explain.' I nudge that mirror again. "I wish you all the happiness in the world." I kissed her forehead. 'I can feel her, why can't I speak?!' I punched the mirror I started walking away. 'Hey turn around, please.' I was sobbing. I went to my room and closed the door.

I can hear her whimper from behind my bedroom door. She sniffed then I heard the apartment door closes. 'Stop her... Please.' I sobbed. "Sienna you need to let her spread her wings, you know you can't be there for her forever." I think that was my conscious or rational thought. I know it's true, but what will I do without her?

I feel betrayed... More than that I'm frustrated. I wanna see her. I can't get the last sound she made out of my head, her tears are too precious. I'm so frustrated. I took a pillow and screamed till I started sobbing. Please god, wake me up already. There were throbbing on my door and the bell rang, I wiped away my tears and opened the door.

"Are you okay?" Dante asked. I let him in and closed the door. "Sienna look at me." He said. I couldn't meet his gaze. "Is Razan alright?" He asked. I shook my head. "I'll take you to see her." He said. 'She wouldn't want to see me though.' I clung to him and sobbed. I think he realized that I can no longer see Razan.

He embraced me silently until I calmed down.